The Consequence of Moving on
by keksmama
Summary: A look at the lives of our favourite crime solving team after what happened in "The Doctor in the Photo"
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is my first Bones story though not my first story altogether. I'm not a native speaker and don't have a beta reader so bare with me. None of the characters belong to me, I just borrow them to write this story.

This is a look at the consequences of both Brennan's and Booth's actions in season 5 and 6 and how their decisions changed their lives over the years. You get to know what happened in the time that has passed by characters talking about the past and what's happened to them.

I hope you enjoy this story and I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.

**The Consequence of Moving on**

Brennan:

I just had the most amazing experience…Booth would probably call it a miracle. And if he said that in my presence I would probably correct him and tell him that there are no such things as miracles…but deep down in my brain I would probably agree. Because today I was present at the beginning of life...

Amelia Temperance Hodgins was born today and I, Temperance Brennan, had the pleasure of seeing her enter this world…

I would have never thought that something so simple as the birth of a child could move me quite this much, especially since it's not my own offspring. With your own offspring and the hormones a woman's body is flooded with during pregnancy and birth I would imagine "being moved" wouldn't quite cover the emotions one would experience. But since Amelia is not even related to me by blood I must admit that I'm quite surprised by how much her birth affects me.

Maybe it is simply because I got to be part of her being born by accident that I feel this way…I'm not sure. It all happened so fast that none of us even had a chance to really think…

Angela had just been finished with the facial reconstruction of our latest murder victim and had come to my office to tell me, when her water broke while she was still standing in the doorway…3 weeks early. And of course Hodgins had to be at an entomology conference in Chicago at exactly that time…unreachable for many more hours.

So it was Cam and myself that took Angela to the hospital and checked her in…thankfully she wasn't having any contractions at that time. In fact she claimed to be fine and wanted to go back home and wait until we could reach Hodgins. I think, she's really glad now that she didn't…

Because as soon as we were finally able to get through to Hodgins…4 hours after the water broke…the contractions started and were immediately so hard and fast, that Jack only barely made it back for the last two pushes before Amelia was born. Hadn't he had his own private plane with him in Chicago I'm sure he would have missed it…and I would have felt very sorry for him because if it affected me the way it did, I can't even begin to imagine what it meant to him.

Now, Angela is fast asleep, recovering from the birth and Hodgins had to go and fill our some papers…so it's me, her Godmother, that's gets to hold this precious little girl while her mother is sleeping.

Other than her mother, Amelia is wide awake and if I didn't know better I'd say she's focusing me with her huge, dark blue eyes. Thinking about it, she might even do that as I have her quite close to my face…but I'll probably never know.

Amelia yawns and stretches in my arms and I can't help but smile at the way she wrinkles her nose when she does so. She looks a lot like Angela with her dark eyes and black hair but I can also see a few similarities to Jack…a perfect mixture Angela said and she's right.

I sigh…thinking back a couple years to when I asked Booth to donate his sperm so I could have an insemination and have a baby…If I'd gone through with it then the baby would now be about 18 months old…that is if the insemination had been successful the first try which is very unlikely…but still…I would have my own "miracle" now and wouldn't be as alone as I've felt these last few months…

I sigh again, knowing it's more or less my own fault, that I am where I am now and that I don't really have anyone anymore to share my life and thoughts with. Sure, I have friends that I meet regularly and that I know care a lot about me…but it's not quite the same as what had with Booth before I turned him down and he moved on.

It is true what people say…you don't know what you had until it's gone. Booth has moved on and is seemingly very happy with Hannah and as much as I hate to admit that…she IS making him look very pleased with his life and I like her for that. Because as much as I hate that it's her doing that, the most important thing is that he is happy.

Amelia has closed her eyes now and sleeping just as peacefully in my arms as her mother is in her bed. I lift her up a bit higher so I can give her a little kiss to the forehead and smell that lovely baby smell again…that I never thought existed because it just doesn't seem rational that all babies would produce the same pheromones that people think of as a pleasant smell…but they seem to do. Baby Andy had that smell and Amelia has it too…so there must be at least some truth in what people say.

Looking at Amelia sleep in my arms and feel her soft skin lets my mind drift off again to that baby I never got to have because of Booth's brain tumor. I realize now that even though I really wanted it back then I only now know exactly how much I wanted it and still want that. I know I can't turn back time…that is simply physically impossible…but I sure wish I could. Things would be so different then…

I know I made a mistake turning him down…and I even admitted that to him…unfortunately I can't change that fact now. But these last couple of hours helping Angela through labor and now holding my little Goddaughter in my arms I know that I've got to move on as well…change something about my life or I'm not sure I'll stay mentally sane no matter how good I am at compartmentalizing.

And looking down at the small infant in my arms I suddenly know exactly what this change has to be...

And then I smile as I feel my heart opening up wide. I know that's anatomically impossible…but that's the only way I can describe what I feel right now.

It is as if all of a sudden everything falls back into place and the emptiness that I felt for so many months now is brushed away in a heartbeat.

You ask what it is that makes me so happy just thinking about it? Well…I've just decided that I want to go through with my plan from so many years ago and have a baby.

I know it won't quite be what I imagined then because I can't use Booth's donation now that he has Hannah…but I'm sure I can find a suitable donor in one of the many sperm banks across this country.

Yes…that is exactly what I'll do…I'm going to have my own little miracle…

* * *

Booth:

Something is different about Bones today and I can't put my finger to it, she just seems somehow different today…

I know, the past few months have not been the easiest for her. And I still punch myself from time to time not waiting longer for her to figure out what she feels.

I like my life the way it is now. Hannah is good for me and I really, truly love her with all my heart…hell, I even proposed to her last month and she accepted.

But…there's always this one thought in the back of my mind that I can't seem to get out of my head no matter how hard I try…

What if I had waited a little longer and not gotten involved with Hannah? Where would Bones and I be now? What would have happened if had I only trusted my gut more…What if…

I knew how Bones felt about me…even before she knew it herself. Why did I not trust her that she would sooner or later figure it out with that super smart brain of hers?

But it's too late now. We've grown apart so much this last year that I don't think she will ever trust me again the way she did before we both left DC. I have to admit to myself that I don't really know her anymore. She used to be my best friend…and most of the time now it looks as if we're not much more than coworkers that are friendly but otherwise keep their distance.

As much as I love Hannah and our relationship…that hurts.

But…I have no one else to blame but myself. After her confession my car that she made a mistake turning me down during the case with the heart surgeon I understand that she had to move on as well. I still see her there in the passenger seat as if it were yesterday. And I know that that night I not only broke her heart by saying no but also our friendship.

There were a few cracks in it before that day but nothing that could not have been repaired…but when I turned her down I know I gave the last push for it to shatter to pieces.

Since that night, Bones has kept her distance and I can't really blame her. There were no more lunch breaks together, no more dinner invitations at her place, no drinks after we've closed a case. The only time I ever saw her outside of work was at Hodgins' place when we were all invited there…

And I have to admit…I miss her. I miss our friendship and the way I was able to talk to her. She knows so much about me…much more than I could ever tell Hannah. Sure, Hannah knows bits and pieces about how I grew up and what I went through as a Ranger…but I don't think she'll ever know as much as Bones. There're just so many things her brilliant brain simply figured out that I never had to tell her because it hurt too much…and that I still can't tell Hannah and that I know she'll never know…not even once we're married. There are just some things that happened in my life that I can't talk about…and with Bones I didn't have to. She just knew…and it was good that she knew because it saved me a hell of a lot of explaining.

I really miss that…

I look at Bones again as she's just handing little Amelia back to her mother and smile…yes, something is different about her today.

When I walked into the room about half an hour ago, Bones was sitting in a chair by the window, holding the baby in her arms…and it looked so natural that I couldn't keep my mind from thinking about another "What if?"…what if Bones had really gone through with using my donation to have a baby? Would she have been happy with her choice for a donor? Would she really have been able to keep her distance once the baby was born?

Another set of questions that we'll never get an answer to but that will probably keep bugging me for a while…because now that I think about it…Bones looked happy holding Amelia…truly happy.

Yes, that's it…she looks happier than she did in months and I don't think it's only because she got to be with Angela when the baby was born…it's something else and it really bothers me that I can't figure it out anymore…I know back in the "old days" it wouldn't have been much of a problem…but now it's just impossible…

I miss my Bones…and I don't think there'll ever come a day where I don't regret how things turned out between us…


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sorry I'm only updating now...my laptop crashed and all that I've written was gone, so I had to type it all in again. I hope you'll still like me when you find out, that is chapter is set 2 years after the first one. You'll find out what happens though from what the characters tell. There'll always be several years between chapters but I promise it'll all end well...though maybe a little later than we'd all like.

Now...enjoy and let me know what you think!

**Chapter 2**

Angela:

She is such an awesome mother! Not that I ever had any doubt about that…the way she was with Amelia from the beginning made that very clear…but it's still kind of amazing to see, how good she really is with her own kid.

I smile as I lean back in the lawn chair I'm sitting in…Brennan has really come a long way since we first met each other. Gone is the awkward woman that didn't know how to communicate with other people…replaced by the most loving mother a child could think of. I know she doesn't believe me when I tell her this…but sometimes I really wish I could be as good as her. If only she could see what everybody else sees…

I can still remember the day she told me she was pregnant like it was yesterday. Probably because I almost fell off my chair from the shock she gave me. I chuckle…I had been expecting a lot from Brennan when she asked me and Amelia to have breakfast with her that day…but not that.

Yes, I had thought for a few months that she had seemed different…happier…than she had been ever since we all got back from our sabbatical. I of course didn't know why but was glad she seemed to get back to her old self after the way Booth had played with her heart.

The way she told me was a typical Brennan…we were talking about Amelia's latest tries of crawling when she simply said: "Give her time Ange, she'll learn it eventually. I hope I can be a bit more patient with my child than you are with her sometimes…"

There I had it. It took me a couple seconds to realize what exactly she'd just told me and about half a minute of serious thinking until it finally hit me that I must have missed something along the way. Of course, all this time my brain was working overtime, Brennan had gone on about something as if nothing had happened. So she didn't really seem pleased when I interrupted her to ask her "Did you just tell me that you're pregnant?"

She'd smiled at me then…one of the biggest smiles I'd ever seen on her face and simply nodded.

At first I was speechless. I know, hard to imagine but I swear it's true. Then I asked her a thousand questions like when? Who? How? How far along? Who again?

She answered all of them calmly and without hesitation…and she must have seen my disappointed look when she told me she'd had an insemination because it was only then she told me the full extend of what had happened between her and Booth…I'd only known bits and pieces till then and spun myself a lovely little story.

By the time she was done telling her story, I had a new godchild and appointed myself Brennan's pregnancy buddy against her protests she didn't need anybody. But I knew from my own experience that I'd more than once been glad to have Jack around while I was expecting Amelia and that day in the diner I'd sworn myself to never let Brennan have to be on her own if she really didn't want to.

So I went to all the doctor's appointments with her, helped her pick out her new house when she decided the area and apartment she lived in were not suitable to bring up a child. We even went to Lamaze class together and had a lot of fun pretending to be a lesbian couple expecting their second child within a year.

Those 6 months that Bren let me be part of her pregnancy, our friendship grew even deeper than it had been before. So there was no doubt at all where Brennan would stay when she started having contractions at only 30 weeks and was put on bed rest for the next 6 weeks.

After that episode, everybody including her doctor had thought, Brennan's baby would surely come early. So when she was allowed to get up again at 36 weeks, we were all waiting for her to go into labor again any day.

But…that little baby inside my best friend's belly…that we didn't know the sex of until it was born…had a different idea…

Brennan's due date had been calculated for a week before Amelia's first birthday. Since we were all expecting the baby to come earlier, we'd never thought it possible that Bren would still be pregnant at her godchild's birthday. But…she was…until about half way through unpacking my daughter's presents when Brennan came up to me and asked me quietly, if now was a good time to interrupt the birthday party…because her contractions were already only 5 minutes apart and she wasn't sure if she could be quiet about them any longer…

So…I got to spend the last part of my daughter's first birthday in the delivery room having my hand crushed…and cutting my godson's umbilical chord after he'd been born into my arms.

Ii was such an amazing experience that I can even forgive Brennan that she couldn't let Matt have his own birthday.

And so here we are today…celebrating Matt's first birthday and Amelia's second. We are at Brennan's new house in the back yard since I've decided to work on my million kids and am expecting another one in about a month. So Bren offered to throw both birthday parties at her place…of course I didn't turn her down.

"You okay?" Jack asks me as he gets down beside me and rubs my belly as I nod. "You sure?" he asks again "You seemed a million miles away just now…"

"I'm fine." I tell him and smile. "Just been thinking about how good life is…"

And it really is…life is good. I have Jack and Amelia and the little one soon to come…Brennan has little Matt…and all of our friends are happy as well…

Yes, life is good…

* * *

Booth:

I'm not really sure I belong here. Bones and I have had so little contact this past year and there are so many people here I don't know…I feel kind of out of place. Thank God I brought Parker and Hannah with me because it's very clear to me now that "my squints" are not mine anymore…

Nobody really notices me as I sit on the steps of Bones' veranda that lead down into the backyard where there seem to be a million Moms and kids running around…one of them the little man of the day Matthew Brennan.

I search for the boy in the crowd and smile when I find him…he must have just started walking a few days ago because toddling around seems to be all he's really interested in. I can still remember that time from when Parker was his age…and now he's almost a teenager.

Matt looks so much like Bones with his long legs and already auburn hair…it's unbelievable and I feel a sting in my heart as I think about the boys dark brown eyes…the eyes of a complete stranger…not mine.

When Bones told me she was pregnant and that it had been done by insemination, my initial thought had been, that she'd used my donation to get inseminated. I can still remember the mixed feelings I had about this…on the one hand I was shocked that she'd go that far and fearful for what it meant for my relationship with Hannah. On the other hand though, there was this underlying feeling of pride and joy…pride that Bones had become pregnant through me and joy because I was going to be a father again and Bones was the mother…

Those mixed feelings only lasted for about half a minute…until Bones set straight that she of course hadn't used my stuff and that the sperm had come from a sperm bank.

After that, I only felt crushed…and have ever since…

I search for Parker in the crowd and find him playing ball with Amelia and Hannah…all three of them seemingly having a lot of fun. Hannah's really a lot better with kids than she says she is…and that's good, because we just decided we'll keep the baby she's carrying.

It's not a planned pregnancy…before we got married half a year ago we had a huge fight about whether we wanted more kids or not. In fact we almost separated. It finally ended when I told her that I'd respect her wish to never have kids of her own but if it happened we'd talk again. She agreed and we got married…but every time I saw Bones with little Matt I felt even more crushed and cheated in a way…knowing that if I'd waited for her, I'd have what I'd been longing for for a while…

It helped though that Bones hasn't been back to work yet and I only get to see her and her boy every other month. I never thought that she could stay away from the Jeffersonian for so long but she did. Her first day back at work will be next Monday…and it'll only be half days then. This woman still amazes me to no end. Then again…I don't really know her anymore so I'm probably in for a few more surprises in the upcoming weeks and months when we'll be working together again…

Back to Hannah…when she found out about the baby 5 weeks ago, she didn't tell me at first, later claiming she had to make up her own mind before she talked to me. It still hurts deeply that she'd just get rid of a child we've both created…although not planned…without telling me. Thankfully though Hannah is an honest person and did eventually inform me of her pregnancy. So we've spent the last few weeks, discussing what to do…and only decided 2 days ago to keep the baby.

But…it comes with a compromise. The main reason Hannah didn't want this baby was the huge job offer she got just a few days before she found out. She'd have her own section in a huge newspaper in California…nobody telling her what to write, free to do whatever she liked…an offer you just don't turn down as a journalist she told me. And I could see it in her eyes that she meant it.

So…we made a compromise. Take the job and move to L.A., I take a desk job at the local FBI office there and take care of the baby once it's born so Hannah's free to do on her job whatever she wants.

I look at Parker again…it'll be hard leaving him here. The little time we have together now will be cut even shorter…I hope he'll forgive me one day that I really chose his sibling over him…

Bones' and Angela's loud laughter reaches my ears and I turn my head to see what they're laughing about...and laugh as well as I see Matt with his face covered in cream from trying to eat his birthday cake.

I'll miss my squints as well…and especially Bones and her son and watching him grow up and her becoming an even better mother than she is now. Because even though he's not mine, I still feel more connected to him than I do to Amelia or any other kid besides Parker…simply because he's the son of the woman I'll always regret I didn't wait for…

Yes…I'll miss this life…


End file.
